Adultery is when you don’t love the one you married, or marry the one you love.
Either way, love is the decisive factor. Without love, everything is adultery.
It’s not just about people. Even if you do a job, and don’t learn to love it, it is adultery.
It is not a question of having an affair with someone outside marriage.
It is impossible to do so, if you love the one you married.
Love is the absence of the lover. You cannot love, and remain as you are.
Love is your death. That’s the only way it works.
Ego and Love cannot co-exist.
For love you have to die. And when you are not there, who is going to have an affair?
There is no such thing as partial love, either you love, or you don’t.
Love is always total and complete, it knows no half hearted efforts.
Which is why, many people go on playing games, in the name of love.
Their sweethearts are only a means to an end.
Pleasure, sense gratification, whatever you name it.
It’s all the same thing.
It’s just another ego trip.
And just like all trips, it comes to an end. It has to reach a climax.
This is when things start falling apart. The illusion is shattered and reality strikes.
Those who called themselves lovers, were merely traders.
Trading one thing for another.
Now the trade is done, now what is the need for them to be together?
But they have to force themselves to somehow stick together.
Now that’s a problem. Two people living under one roof, without an ounce of love for each other.
But then love’s close cousin appears to come to their aid.
Even if they can’t love one another, at least they can be affectionate towards each other.
Affection can appear like a cheap replacement for love, but it’s not the same thing.
It’s like being affectionate towards your dog, because he’s been with you for several years.
You can care for one another, fulfill each others needs, but you cannot become one.
There is a pain of separation, of being two.
As long as you remain two, you are committing adultery.
Now you might say, but isn’t marriage mean’t to be about two people taking care of each others needs.
Not exactly. But if that’s what you signed up for, then you can have it that way.
You can do a fair trade. And remain life long traders.
It will be a nice partnership, but nothing beyond that.
Marriage is an opportunity to experience union, perhaps, for the first time in your life.
To become one with the other, in all your totality, mind-body-spirit.
In this is the glimpse of the divine.
It is a door, that helps you experience what oneness feels like.
What it is like to not live as you have always lived — preoccupied with yourself.
It teaches you to become self-less, and live for another, and find the beauty in doing so.
If you cannot become one with the lover, how can you be ready to become one with the ultimate lover?
Yes, we’re talking God, The Almighty, The Supreme Creator.
Marriage is sacred, because it takes you to the sacred.
Yes, along the way you have children, and a family, which is good, but that’s not where it ends.
A holy marriage, a marriage born and bred in love, always leads you to God.
I am not talking about a religious God.
I am not saying marriage makes you more religious, I am only saying it helps you get in touch with that which is spiritual in you.
Either way, whichever path you take, if ultimately, it does not lead to Him, then what’s the point?
It’s a life wasted, an opportunity wasted.
Your lover is the doorway to the divine.
This is why, you have to die, and dissolve, for unless you are born again, you cannot enter the kingdom of God.
The question is, not about adultery any more, it is about whether you are ready to die to yourself, so you can be born to Him?
What is this death I am referring to?
It is a profound death, the great death, the sweetest death in the world.
It is the death of the intellectual identity, the ego, the false self.
It’s a psychological death.
Where you no longer see yourself as separate from the world.
When you know, that you and I are one.
Until this happens, suffering is inevitable.
Truth requires crucifixion of the ego, and until that happens, everything in life is adultery.
It is a diluted act, because it lacks innocence.